When, as a child, I wished for summer, my birthday, or Christmas my mom would say, “Carmen, you’re wishing your life away.” I didn’t quite grasp what she meant. My life seemed endless before me. Now as an adult, there have been seasons – days, weeks, months – that I wanted to wish away too. Seeing no value in the path I was walking. One of the things that has encouraged me during a difficult…
“Carmen, you have the opportunity to help Lary be a better man.” When Gil, our counselor, spoke those words it almost seemed like he was speaking in a foreign language. We married when I was only sixteen years old. He, twenty. By the time Gil said that, our marriage had long established behaviors (ruts). The concept that I should do anything that might make Lary uncomfortable or upset (on purpose) seemed ridiculous. I saved those…
Sometimes it seems as if the odds are stacked against us. Have you ever said, “This is just who I am or how I was raised.”? Struggling with a habit or behavior that is hard to change is so frustrating. We’ve all heard the statistics – abuse victims are more likely to abuse, children of alcoholics are more likely to become alcoholics and obesity tends to run in families. I am a child of divorced parents…
Today my dad has been enjoying heaven for three years. Time does fly and then again, I can close my eyes and remember that day and those preceding it so vividly. As I read this again today, I asked myself are these words still me. Did I still feel as if they honored my dad and our relationship. I think they do. The original title was “It’s Complicated” and written on June 17, 2012, just a…
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