When Sharing Stories Might Hurt Our Marriage…
“Whoever covers an offense seeks love, but he who repeats a matter separates close friends”. Proverbs 17:9 (ESV)
Recounting the mess ups of those we love may make for entertaining conversation but that kind of story telling can erode trust and security in our marriages. When those mistakes have made us angry or hurt, the temptation is to vent. Most often, venting brings regret. When we share those feelings with God and limit what we share with others, we honor our spouses.
Lary and I have learned this the painful way. We are still learning these lessons. Sometimes it just seems too funny not to share. I am trying to remember that what I may think is funny, could be very embarrassing to my guy. It helps me to think back on times he has shared in this way and I didn’t like it.
We can make our marriages safe places to discuss our failures and successes. Openly communicating with our spouses about how and when its O.K. to reveal those antidotes and stories with others reduces embarrassment and hurt.
Become your sweetheart’s biggest cheerleader. Let those funny mistakes be a private joke (unless we have permission) and during those painful times, lets talk to each other more than others. When trust and security increase in our marriage, intimacy does too.
Linking with…
Beth Steffaniak’s Wedded Wednesday and Crystal Storms’ Intentional Tuesday
Such truth in your words, Carmen … “When trust and security increase in our marriage, intimacy does too.” I believe lack of trust is a barrier to intimacy. Thank you, Carmen, for sharing your heart at #IntentionalTuesday on Intentionally Pursuing. : )
Love linking with you friend. Thanks for stopping by.
Amen! Stories at the expense of another can derail the safety in a marriage. Good post, my friend.
Thank you Kristi.
Great truth and insight for us to remember!!! Thank You!!!
Thank you Lisa.
Oh yes, Carmen! I think I’ve done this with my friends–shared something that I thought was funny at the expense of my hubby. We all laugh, but I’m certain if my hubby was present, he might not be laughing with us! I try to honor him by not doing this, but I know that sometimes I let that honor be the last thing I’m thinking of or doing, so I’m grateful for your nudge! Thanks for another great post, my sweet friend!
I always enjoy linking with you Beth. Thanks for stopping by.